I never wrote a 3.5 yr blog for Logan because it is getting harder and harder to try to some up these wonderful kids in words. Wyatt’s blog, though it captured a lot of him, I kept thinking afterwards about how it just can’t capture how wonderful (and occasionally mischievous) he is. Logan, as a 4 year old is impossible. He has developed into a sensitive, curious, friendly, playful, kind, smart, and adventurous kid. I’m shocked at how well rounded he is as a kid and how much he surprises me every day. He is that “good kid” who almost always makes the right decision. He is a good listener and he is great with smaller kids. I can leave him and Wyatt in a room and not worry that logan will do anything that would hurt him. He is a kind and caring big brother and will look out for wyatt and keep him safe. Of course it is fun as a parent and look down and realize the sky is the limit for your little guy. Im so excited to see what the next year and 100 years will bring for this kid.
Language
Logan is still way ahead for his age. He is extremely verbal and communicative. He is generally good and expressing his wants and needs. I think as a result, we didn’t have much trouble with the threenager year, though we did have a few bizzaro emotional moments. He is very curious and asks lots of questions. He has gained pretty complex understanding of many things and is really ready to hear anything. We try not to shy away from answering the tough questions and try to feed his curiosity and show him new things and expose him to new activities. Just today he asked what happened to my dog I had as a kid so we continued our multipart conversation about death. We are constantly complimented by people on his communication, both how easy he is to understand and how much he has to say. He really enjoys talking and will carry on long and complicated conversations.
Reading/math
Logan has been doing reading Kumon for most of the year and recently started math Kumon. It is amazing the progress he made over the year. From only knowing the letter names in spring to reading well now and having mastered not just the short vowel sounds but consistently doing well with long vowel and weird sounds (think “ew” “ight” “th” “ch” “ay” “all” “oy” “ow”, etc). He loves to do kumon now and is in the bedtime routine where we used to read a book. He gets to stay up a little later and he really enjoys doing it. He has had to work on focusing and not guessing when he is having trouble concentrating or when the word is hard. But he has progressed tremendously at his focus. It gets harder when the packet is harder, but overall he is great. He also can write all the letters and his penmanship has improved dramatically. He takes great pride in being able to read well and it is really fun to watch him succeed. Kumon isn’t cheap but it is nice to be able to nurture his interest in reading and learning. It is also fun to see how his ability to read is helping him pronounce things better. He says “f” instead of “th” and it is nice to be able to show him, for instance that 3 is “three” and four is “four” so he can see how to pronounce it differently.
Logan has been doing math kumon for about a month now. He really wasn’t picking up counting over 10 consistently and couldn’t recognize the numbers. He also didn’t have much patience in counting. He saw that other kids were doing math kumon and asked if he could too. It doubles our costs but again we weighed our options and signed up. He is so used to the kumon “system” that it makes it easiest to use. He does math kumon as his “reading” before nap. Both are now well integrated into his routine. He is learning quickly and soon will move to the math part. He already understands some math concepts, but I except he’ll pick up the rest quickly.
It is probably unnecessary to teach him all of this now still almost 2 years from when he will start kindergarten, but I see no reason to delay if he is interested and progressing. We’ll probably have to work a bit to keep him interested in kindergarten, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. It is also nice to be able to teach him all of this while still focusing 95% of his day on the soft skills that are crucial to learn at this age. We looked at some academic preschools, but those spend a large bulk of the day on education, which wouldn’t be ideal.
Social
He goes to a preschool that really works on his friendship skills and he loves it. We actually moved him to 3 day/week school this year (9-12). He was originally in tues and Thursday but the class was really small and all his friends were in school m,w,f, so they weren’t available for play dates on days logan was free. We now have a great routine including gymnastics Tuesday morning and dance Tuesday afternoon. He loves his school and has two best friends: Stephanie and Nicholas. He had a third (Oliver) but he changed schools! I met another mom of a kid logan never talks about who said logan was all her kid talked about. I wonder if logan forgets his name or if it is one sided. I hope he’s nice to him, but I’m sure he is. It would be fun to watch their dynamic at school. He seems to be developing great bonds and kept telling me on thanksgiving that he was thanking for Stephanie and Nicholas. We also have several friends on the outside and he growing good bonds with them. He plays generally well and peacefully but can get egged on by other more impulsive kids to make poorer choices. For instance, he shares will with a kid who shares well and takes turns. If logan takes his turn and hands it over and the other kid doesn’t hand it back at the end of their turn, then things get tricky. With the right group, he needs no supervision.
He and wyatt also play well and are never violent or physical with each other. Of course they are rough and tumble and run around and fall and trip, but he has never tried to hurt his brother and I am grateful for his kind and gentle (if also adventurous) soul.
He’s also got a great imagination and has really (in the last few months) embraced playing pretend. He will pretend they are going on a picnic or pretend they are taking a bath in the bed or all number of things. It is fun to see him embrace this. And if you get too into, he’ll say “mom, it’s just pretend, it’s not real food so you shouldn’t eat it.” I can definitely see some of myself in that, but wow it is fun to see how he is using that imagination side of his brain.
Physical
Logan is getting stronger and more coordinated. He’s running quite fast, can jump high and is even learning to tap dance. He is the in the 4-5 gymnastics class and had is first “show” the other week. They performed a specific routine. He did a great job! It is fun to watch him learn new skills and also continue his love of physical activity. Our nice open indoor play space really encourages the boys to run and jump and we recent brought the little slide inside. It may give us heartburn sometimes, but it is great to watch the kids being so physical. He loves to wrestle and play but is still very good at taking instructions and changing his behavior based on specific guidance. He does especially well with concrete instructions like your feet have to go down the slide first, versus, don’t hit your head or don’t go down head first. He needs to know what to do and then he’ll do it 99% of the time.
Food/routines/sleep
Logan is a pretty picky kid. He has great junk-dar (junk radar) and will try just about anything that is sugar, fat or carb. But of course he also can spot and avoid a veggie a mile away (full tantrums available to protest any veggie). He is getting pretty good and consistent with eating fruit and definitely has a favorite fruit – Persimmon! Leave it to charles’ kid to love persimmons. He also regularly eats blueberries, strawberries, banana, grapes and raspberries. He likes pomegranates if Charles is fresh shelling them. He isn’t as much a fan of oranges and won’t eat apples (neither kid will). He is learning what different food does for your body and knows that eating fruit helps his bowels. We also regularly talk about what helps you grow big and strong and what doesn’t and how important it is to listen to your stomach. He has a bit of a sensitive tummy and it is nice to see him acknowledge (in the middle of a favorite food) that his tummy says it’s time to stop. Since he is higher in weight, we have allowed him to leave the table whenever he is done eating so he isn’t encouraged to eat more than his body wants. He loves junk food and sugar but has learned when we do and don’t get it. I’m hopeful in this next year he will learn more about food an voluntarily make better choices.
Logan is great at the normal kid routine stuff now: putting on/taking off shoes, washing hands, using potty, brushing teeth, bussing the table, getting in and out of cars, opening doors, etc.. It’s fun to see him be so independent! He can also help wyatt through these routines. It is so nice to walk out to the car with both hands free and have both of my kids open doors and climb into car. We still buckle both kids (logan can unbuckle but isn’t strong enough to buckle), but it is quick and simple and HANDS FREE.
He is a fantastic sleeper. People always tell me stories about kids skipping naps or dropping naps but the only times Logan has not napped is when we have been travelling. He ALWAYS naps. He needs 12 hours and night and his 2 hour nap. Wyatt seems to live better with less sleep, but not my Logan. I’m grateful that he takes this time to take care of himself and dread if he ever stops napping.
He loves his big boy bed tremendously and I’m so proud of him for moving into it. As a quick side store, Logan has been pretty rigid about his sleep since about 1. He was very particular about his crib, the animals allowed in it, and what was allowed in his room. Pretty much nothing was added to the room after 1. If he brought in a new toy, he would ask us to leave with it. When he started climbing in and out of crib safely at 2 something, we asked him if he wanted the other rail and he said no. Later when 3 he was interested. We put it on and he and wyatt loved playing but when it was bedtime, logan was very upset and needed his regular rail back on. We tried one more time at his request and then quick. We decided on a new plan of buying a bed together, putting it in the room, leaving the crib in, and letting him acclimate. He picked a bed my friend was giving away. It is an ikea kura bed. It is a lot bed or a bed at normal height with a boxy frame and canopy around. We got to go to their house and pick up all the pieces (he helped carry it). He then helped Julia build it and put it in his room. When the first nap came with the bed in his room, we were all nervous and he got into his crib like nothing had happened (we were elated). Shortly after he started sleeping in his bed for some naps but would not get in at night. After a few weeks, one night while driving I said “you know Logan, at some point we might just have to take your crib out of your room if you don’t choose to sleep in your big boy bed.” He said “let’s take the crib out tonight.” I didn’t want to pressure him, so we discussed for a while and I said he had a lot more time but he was adamant. So I got out the hex wrench and he helped take apart his crib and carry it into our room. That night he happily got in his bed and never looked back! I’m so proud of him for doing it and proud of us for letting him do it on his terms. For some (like wyatt), the bed transition will be a non-issue, but for others it is. We all have our things and sleep is Logan’s, so it was a big deal and he did well. He sleeps much better now too because the bed is SUPER comfy (I did lots of research on a low voc, healthy comfy mattress) and he now has a sheet, which is great since he is a sweaty monster. He has a paw patrol blanket and comforter but only uses the sheet. He also has his snake, his baby, his owl and his mickey in the bunny costume in his bed. Lately he puts toys at the foot of the bed to play with in the morning.
Improvements
Logan has improved in his flexibility a lot. The bed example is good above, but he also got on the carousal at the mall in California this summer which was a HUGE surprise. He did better with Halloween this year but still doesn’t like people in masks and hated the candy bowl with the fake hand that snapped down (many tears were cried). He is better with crowds and has gone from melting down in stressful situations to expressing his unhappiness or telling me later he doesn’t want to go again. We went to a loud sports bar (we were going for an Oktoberfest thing with a life band but there was a dumb football game on) and instead of losing his mind, he just said “mommy it is really loud in here and I don’t like it. Can we leave soon?” it was great.
He still isn’t a fan of big crowds (neither is wyatt) in a house. They don’t seem to mind stores and other big spaces with lots of people. Logan still refused to go into Santa’s house at the mall today (but a bunch of adults had just walked in). Wyatt really wanted to go in, so I’ll have to give him the chance.
Logan has always been empathetic and sensitive but it has just grown as he’s gotten older. He really is a good human and a good friend. He uses his words and is a great helper. Every once and a while he’ll be a brat about something random, but for the most part, he wants to help and he cares about others. We’ve also helped him figure out how to say things sensitively and sometimes if he is a bit brusque I’ll just ask him to “try again” and he’ll make the necessary adjustments. Preschool has helped him play more cooperatively and work on fostering his friendships. He is to the age now where he can play super independently with others and will make up games and explain them. He and wyatt do it but he does it with others too.
He is still a kid and he still has moments where sometimes he can’t express his feelings. He told me one time that he wished papa wasn’t coming over the next day and that he “hated papa.” My initial instinct is to say “no you love papa” but I realized a while ago that that is a very flawed message as a parent. We need to listen to them and show that they can tell us anything, even when we are pretty sure what they are saying doesn’t make sense. In this case, logan has a very special bond with papa and loves him dearly. We talk about him a lot when he’s gone. I listened to him and then said, “hmm tell me more, what don’t you like about papa.” He said “I don’t like playing in papa’s car.” Well now I knew it was extra fishy because not only does he love spending time with papa but he and wyatt can play happily for hours in the car and beg to go do it. So we talked a while more and I realized that papa was coming for the 5th straight afternoon because my hip was so sore that I wasn’t able to play. I asked him if he missed playing with me. He said “yeah, I don’t want papa to come, I want you to play with us.” When papa comes, I usually rest and he misses me. He doesn’t mind papa and would be delighted to have me AND papa, but papa signified no mama, and he didn’t like that. We had a really good chat and I promised to spend some quality time when I could and he greeted papa the next day with a giant hug and told me how much fun he had with papa at dinner. I cuddled him extra and made sure to talk to him lots that night. I love being able to fix these things and help him think things through. Though at his age, he rarely gets there on his own, and sometimes it can be quite a puzzle. It’ll be interesting to see if this improves over the next year.
Overall
I’m almost tearing up as I write this but I’m so proud of this little guy. I met with my friend Kira and she has really worked on emotional maturity with her kids and I thought I was failing my kids. But I look at them, and I think about the times I have helped logan work through his emotions or empowered him to communicate with others, or trusted him to hear my guidance and make good decisions, and I realize that somehow between our parenting and his innate nature, he has turned into a happy, sweet, sensitive and smart 4 year old boy. I never realized 4 year olds had this much depth to them. I am awed every day by him. It is such a blessing to get to listen to him talk and spend lots of time with him. I miss him during the day but I treasure my afternoons and early evenings with him. I feel so hopeful for the future. I know he’ll excel at school and make good friendships. I know we have a lot of challenges as parents ahead of us, but I feel like I can breathe a sigh of relief that we have done right by this 4 year old super kiddo so far!
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